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13 marca 2015

Phil, my DH, aka: Skinny Butt, says, "How 'bout you make some of those chocolate lava cookies I love so much?" I returned serve with, "How 'bout you tell me my big butt looks great in these jeans?"

He ate 3 dang cookies. The rest, went in the trash.

Bravo, me!

(1 komentarz)

12 marca 2015

Press the support button if you join this prayer for Ann444's surgery today...

Dear Lord,

We lift Ann up in our thoughts and prayers today,
with gratefulness to You. We ask Your Holy Spirit be present with her today to comfort her! We pray that you bless Ann, her surgeon, the nurses and hospital staff with Your healing will to be done. May her recovery be swift, in Your name!

We give thanks to You Lord and Bless Your Holy Name, as Your will be done!
Thank You God, for the pleasure to pray for Your wonderful daughter, Ann!
We claim these things in the name of The Father, The Son and The Holy Ghost!

-Amen

(1 komentarz)

10 marca 2015

This evening I found myself thinking, "I'm so flippin' hungry that if Mo-Mo kitty got up on this table and ate some of my yogurt, I'd totally eat it anyway."

(8 komentarze)

09 marca 2015

It was nearly 5 am this morning, I looked down at my dashboard to see the blue light indicating high beams on, to be excessively bright. And within a split second, there it was; the orbital, spinning ocular prism; the first sign of an on-coming migraine.

I'm not prone to illness, and migraines are luckily few an far between. And how I loathe them! I don't know how people with chronic pain adapt. I am a self-admitted wimp and hypochondriac. My mind becomes laughably sordid with thoughts so ridiculously grim. These thoughts usually find me at around 2 a.m. I vanquish them with a free-watch on the tube.

Last winter, with my back to the wood stove, I lifted my gown to aid the flow of heat up my backside and rubbed my ice-cold flabby butt. Suddenly, a shocking wave of horror ran through me as I found a "lump" in the medial aspect of my left glutinous region. My diagnosis: last stage butt cancer courtesy of Dr. Deb.

I imagined my friends and colleagues shaking their heads and chatting it up at my wake. "What a shame she waited so long to do anything about her ass." "I shall miss her salt caramel brownies." And yet another, "Who was she again?"

I later found the lump to be nothing more than a tissue adhesion brought about by muscle strain and a case of simple Sciatica.

So my trip to work ended with a phone call to a much understanding boss. There are no streetlights where I live making it even more difficult to see.

I had to make my trip back brief, in order to get home before the pain would begin. And if I could get to sleep quickly, I might let my husband off easy without too much whining and repetitive descriptive narrative.

I dropped my clothes at bedside and sleep came easy. I woke only for a bite of perfect eating and then drifted back...to a place that seemed oddly familiar. A huge stone mansion with gardens surrounding it. I looked at the stonework and realized this was my house. The door opened with the turn of my key and there was a moving truck out front with my beautiful, contemporary furniture in it. And then, with a violent snort, I awakened. My video had concluded, and my husband crept in the room.

With his Liverpudlian accent he said, "I found the smell."
"Which smell would that be?" I inquired.
"The smell in the reptile room. It's one of the hibernating Tegus we rescued. The one that had the mouth rot. I did me best, but he's died."

My husband's vernacular is peculiar when written, but very endearing in person. So whenever you read something Phil says, you sort of have to think of how The Beetles would say it.

So, I probably need to back up a little at this point. We rescue animals. Not for a living, more as a hobby that sort of crept up on us.
In the past eight years horses, dogs, donkeys, goats, tarantulas tortoise, cats, geckos, chameleons, ball pythons, Tegu, Boas, frogs, Iguana, scorpions, bearded dragons and reptile feeders such as rodents and insects have been a constant source of joy and wonder.

At present we have one forever cat, Mo-Mo, one forever horse, Thomas and a host of reptiles which live in one ambient temperature controlled room.

To be continued...

(6 komentarze)

08 marca 2015

My workday began with my thermos of beautiful black coffee. I and my associates enjoy nothing more than lavishing one another with delicious, sumptuous, hot breads, fresh from the oven.

My bookkeeper and I, being resolute, shared a Larabar in lieu of the fresh offerings pouring into my work station...hot fresh bagels, home-made muffins, fine cheeses, butter and other slings and arrows.

I gave my tempting offerings to other more willing participants of ill health, who were as quick as a grab and snatch to comply.

In the two years that I had fallen off the wagon, I and my colleagues have managed to share our dilution of being healthy and happy regardless of a little spillage of flesh over Lane Bryant trousers and double "D"s.
My comrades, and I, up the same creek with adjoining paddles, echo loving sentiments each day, with the promise that tomorrow will be a new day. "Please be sure to grab a brownie from the front desk, they're salt caramel." And the proverbial, "Try the asparagus, it's bacon wrapped."

When it comes down to my love of all things deliciously bad for me, I become a dog eying the last turn of a banger on the grill.

So with that said, my day is concluding with a bang, not a banger. A simply amazing day filled with the right nutrition which makes me feel far less of a dog.

(5 komentarze)

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